I’m sure you’ve been there before. That feeling that you just don’t want to do that thing you’re supposed to do…that thing you have to do. You sit down to the computer and stare at the blank Word document. You know that paper won’t write itself, but your mind is blank, and your body is tired. Your stamina wanes. There’s a deadline looming, but hardly makes a dent in that feeling of apathy.
This is me at this moment. 4 1/2 weeks left until graduation, and I’m just…done. Now, before you think I’m just seeking attention or fishing for encouragement, stop. Just stop. I write because God puts things on my heart – perhaps so that I can more fully process whats going on in my life, or maybe (and this is my hope) so that someone else may benefit from my experiences. Anyways.
This evening, I sat down to work on my TPA – that big, crazy paper I have to write to graduate. You know. Thankfully, there are prompts, so I’m not just pulling stuff out of thin air. But the prompts are wordy and complicated. And my brain feels tired and foggy. And I just don’t even want to try to clear the fog. My motivation is tanked (well, at least for tonight). Yet, I have no choice. I have to write this paper. I have to go to school tomorrow and teach the kiddos. So what do I do with this? How do I manage it?
First, I change my perspective. Instead of saying that “I have to go to school tomorrow,” I need to think more like “I get to go to school tomorrow”. I’ll admit, though…it’s hard to think of the TPA as a privilege.
But more important than changing my perspective, I’ll go to God – to His word.
So maybe this discipline isn’t “painful”, but the point remains. When we experience things that are challenging or painful or ___________,it’s not pleasant. But YES, we will grow through the experience if we allow ourselves to do so.
And the second promise I’m clinging to right now:
No, I’m not “suffering”, but I do believe that my challenges in student teaching will bring about good and growth in me.
So I’m probably done working on my TPA for tonight. But there is tomorrow. And the day after, and so on. I’ll reach down deep inside and find some motivation – or make some. And it’s gonna be okay 🙂
I hope you’ve found some encouragement in these words.
And if you’re like me, dealing with burnout, how do you motivate yourself?